The faith that was meant to heal me was actually killing me - Aaron Tomlinson

Today I spoke with Aaron Tomlinson, who grew up believing in Jesus and became a pastor for many years, but ultimately deconverted as the truth claims of Christianity fell apart. We touched on many topics, including: • Turning to Christianity not just because of religious upbringing but as a way to cope with overwhelming loss and pain after a traumatic collapse of his family’s financial stability and community standing. • Experiencing Christianity as an emotional and psychological bypass as it offered him an identity and purpose without ever allowing him to process the original wounds. • Deconstructing major Christian doctrines like penal substitutionary atonement and the Rapture long before fully leaving the faith and subsequently shifting toward Christian mysticism and progressive Christianity even during his time as a pastor. • Never feeling at home among other pastors or with the authority and spotlight that came with the title "pastor," and often feeling like a fraud trapped in a system he instinctively knew was wrong, despite leading a growing and successful church. • Realizing that Christianity had stolen his ability to live authentically, pressuring him to constantly strive to please an invisible judge and suppress his true emotions and desires. • During trauma counseling, understanding that the very thing that was supposed to heal him — Christianity — had deeply traumatized him, especially the doctrines of original sin, divine wrath, and hell. • Identifying as neither a traditional theist nor an atheist tied to scientific materialism, but instead, staying open to metaphysical possibilities outside the framework of Abrahamic religions and physicalism. • Moving beyond analysis-paralysis into embodied living and fully feeling emotions without judging them, instead of just intellectualizing life. • Raising his kids to explore belief systems freely, emphasizing critical thinking over dogmatic faith, and supporting them without any coercion. • Finding purpose in helping others heal through mental health counseling, raising his family authentically, and living openly without fear — not needing divine validation, but creating meaning through real human relationships. Many thanks to Aaron for sharing his story and insights! _________________________________________ Connect with Aaron: @newdayglobal Derrick Day's interview: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0CmC7vhx-sE _________________________________________ Your support for my channel, Harmonic Atheist, is very needed and appreciated! One-time donations: PayPal: paypal.me/harmonictim Venmo: @harmonicatheist Zelle email: [email protected] GoFundMe: https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-tim-stay-full-time-on-harmonic-atheist Monthly donations: https://www.patreon.com/harmonicatheist You can also "Join" the Harmonic Atheist YT channel to get access to perks, which will be coming soon: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCrPKXNg9PAL6bROvsaUFvAA/join Thanks! --Tim _________________________________________ Want to create live streams like this? Check out StreamYard: https://streamyard.com/pal/d/4917726076600320 (FYI - using that link does help support me ) _________________________________________ If you are facing emotional distress, please call the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988. _________________________________________ Ending music by Kazuya / Eyal Raz, "Friends" https://artlist.io/royalty-free-music/song/friends/2825 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4qbqNO6DdAQ _________________________________________