How to Deal With Boundary Bullies, Including Narcissists - Terri Cole

Do you know any Boundary Bullies? These are people who want what they want regardless of how you feel about it. They can act in overt or covert ways to ram their agenda through. Interacting with them can be stressful and leave you feeling defeated and drained. In today’s video I cover: -- The connection between your own blueprint or past experience with boundary bullies and whom you are attracting into your life today. -- The 3 Questions to ask yourself to identify the original boundary bully -- How to Stop the Auto Yes -- How to Create Clear, Concise & Consistent Boundaries with Boundary Bullies Those of you who are familiar with my work know that the first step to changing anything is to try to get to the root of the original injury. Your boundary bully downloaded blueprint from childhood is where we begin. During your childhood, were you allowed to draw boundaries, disagree with the majority or say no in your family of origin? Did one of your parents or caregivers dominate the others in the group? Were you encouraged to assert yourself or would differentiating result in punishment? Chaotic family systems where there was abuse, addiction, neglect or extremely high expectations for children usually do not encourage or teach healthy boundaries. But fear not, you can learn. Download the free guide that goes along with this episode: https://terricole.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/07/Boundary-Language-Tips-and-Visualization-Exercise.pdf TIME STAMPS: 0:00 - Introduction 0:55 - Why we need to figure out where our relationship with boundaries began 2:27 - Questions to reflect on to get to the root of your boundaries 5:20 - The three questions to ask yourself to identify whether you're having a transference 8:07 - How to ease into saying "no" instead of automatically saying yes 9:11 - How to stay calm in a difficult boundary situation 12:41 - How to change the relationship dynamic you have with a boundary bully 14:46 - Why being super clear, concise, and consistent helps when stating a boundary 18:24 - Not everyone deserves the privilege of being in your life RELATED VIDEOS: Why Codependents and Narcissists Can't Break Up: https://youtu.be/Fp1auZKZQHs How to Set Boundaries With Impossible People, Including Narcissists: https://youtu.be/ccF6VFIdPCg How to Create Bulletproof Protection Against Psychopaths and Narcissists: https://youtu.be/dDTF5iXvbi4 Codependents + Narcissists, Heal the Toxic Cycle with Boundaries: https://youtu.be/VqwxFVfsIWE ABOUT TERRI COLE Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist and global leading expert in female empowerment. For two decades, Terri has worked with some of the world’s most well-known personalities from international pop stars to Fortune 500 CEOs. She has a gift for making complex psychological concepts accessible and actionable so that clients and students achieve sustainable change. She inspires over 450,000 people weekly through her blog, social media platform, signature courses, and her popular podcast, The Terri Cole Show. For more, see https://www.terricole.com/ CONNECT WITH ME: Instagram: https://www.terricole.com/ig Membership: https://terricole.com/tcm Newsletter: https://www.terricole.com/newsletter RESOURCES Too Much: A Guide to Breaking the Cycle of High-Functioning Codependency: https://hfcbook.com Boundary Boss Book: https://amzn.to/44DZID9 The Boundary Boss Workbook: https://amzn.to/3Ra7CRU Insight Timer: https://insig.ht/cpKnbJB4KDb (I have a bunch of free meditations on here and love this app!) BetterHelp: https://betterhelp.com/terricole I’m not currently taking any new one-on-one therapy or coaching clients, but highly recommend using BetterHelp to find a therapist that fits your needs. As a team, we have fully vetted BetterHelp's resources. https://www.terricole.com/gethelp/ -- If you are in a crisis or any other person may be in danger the resources on this page can provide you with immediate help. _Please note: If you choose to sign up for BetterHelp or Insight Timer or buy through my Amazon links, I will receive a commission. Please know that I only recommend services and products that I know & trust._ #terricoleshow #narcissism #boundaries #settingboundaries