Breaking the Codependency Cycle: Family Systems, Self-Differentiation, and the Path to Healing

Ross Rosenberg and Jerry Weiss discuss codependency and its effects on identity and family dynamics. Jerry, a recovering codependent, shares how codependency impacted his self-esteem and happiness. They introduce Murray Bowen's family systems theory, highlighting how interconnected family behaviors influence individual identities and can perpetuate issues like codependency and narcissism across generations, illustrated by the concept of "family system Wi-Fi." The hosts also explore self-differentiation, the process of separating one's identity from family influences, which is often resisted in dysfunctional families. They use analogies like a thermostat and escape velocity to describe the challenges of breaking free from unhealthy dynamics. The episode touches on the cycle of hope experienced by codependents in relationships with narcissists, who often neglect their own needs for validation. As the conversation unfolds, they stress the importance of self-focus and the potential loss of relationships during the journey of self-love and recovery. Jerry provides resources for support, including coaching and free training on his website. The episode concludes by encouraging listeners to reflect on their experiences and the systemic nature of their relational patterns, promoting healing and self-discovery. Be sure to leave another question to be answered in the next installment of the Self-Love Mailbag. Jerry Wise, MA, MS, CLC, is a Family Systems expert with 45+ years of experience helping adults from toxic, narcissistic families break free and find peace, freedom, and their true selves. Learn more: jerrywiserelationshipsystems.com. Consider subscribing to Ross Rosenberg's/Self-Love Recovery Institute's new Patreon Subscription, where you can access exclusive content, insights, and services. https://www.patreon.com/RossRosenbergSLRIatreon ABOUT ROSS ROSENBERG Ross Rosenberg, M.Ed., LCPC, CADC, is a psychotherapist, educator, expert witness, and celebrated author. He is also a global thought leader and clinical expert in codependency, trauma, pathological narcissism, narcissistic abuse, and addictions. Ross's pioneering contributions to codependency have provided sweeping theoretical and practical updates and developed a treatment program that permanently resolves the issue. Ross has been featured on national TV and radio and is a regular radio and podcast guest. In addition, he has traveled the world, giving his one-of-a-kind keynote presentations and educational workshops. His global impact is best illustrated by his YouTube channel, with 30 million views and 297,000 subscribers, and the sale of 190,000 Human Magnet Syndrome books published in 12 languages. In 2013, Ross created The Self-Love Recovery Institute, a hub for his personal development, workshops, professional training, retreats, other programs, and services. Learn more at www.SelfLoveRecovery.com. Facebook.com/TheCodependencyCure) Instagram (@rossrosenberg_slri) Twitter (@RossRosenberg1) and now…TikTok! (@RossRosenberg1)