This video explains the concept of a “favorite person” in Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and offers ways to maintain healthy relationships while finding balance. A favorite person is someone who becomes the center of your world, like a romantic partner, best friend, or parent, providing feelings of safety and love. However, this deep dependence can lead to problems such as fear of being left, blurred boundaries, and reliance on one person for happiness. For example, Sarah might feel rejected if her boyfriend doesn’t text her immediately, or Lisa might feel unloved when her mom doesn’t answer a call.
To build healthier relationships, it’s important to recognize patterns of overdependence, connect with others, and learn self-soothing techniques like journaling or breathing exercises. Setting boundaries and focusing on personal hobbies, such as painting or joining a club, can help you feel happy and secure on your own. By creating balance, you can strengthen your relationships without losing your sense of self. The video concludes with encouragement to share experiences and tips for support, emphasizing that healthy, loving relationships are possible.
Daniel J. Fox, Ph.D., is a licensed psychologist in Texas, international speaker, and a multi-award-winning author. He has been specializing in the treatment and assessment of individuals with personality disorders for over 20 years in the state and federal prison system, universities, and in private practice. His specialty areas include personality disorders, ethics, burnout prevention, and emotional intelligence.
Check out Dr. Fox’s online course:
www.bpdcourse.com
He has published several articles and books in these areas and is the author of:
BPD Guided Journal: Journal: Your Space to Release Intense Emotions, Nurture Self-Compassion, and Take Charge of Borderline Personality Disorder. Available at: https://shorturl.at/Ta5Dj
The BPD Card Deck: 50 Ways to Balance Emotions and Live Well with Borderline Personality Disorder. Available at: www.shorturl.at/jBHJV
Complex Borderline Personality Disorder: How Coexisting Conditions Affect Your BPD and How You Can Gain Emotional Balance. Available at:
https://rb.gy/hdyqyy
Antisocial, Narcissistic, and Borderline Personality Disorders: A New Conceptualization of Development, Reinforcement, Expression, and Treatment. Available at: https://tinyurl.com/2anv8dww
The Borderline Personality Disorder Workbook: An Integrative Program to Understand and Manage Your BPD. Available at: https://goo.gl/LQEgy1
Antisocial, Borderline, Narcissistic and Histrionic Workbook: Treatment Strategies for Cluster B Personality Disorders (IPBA Benjamin Franklin Gold Award Winner): https://goo.gl/BLRkFy
Narcissistic Personality Disorder Toolbox: 55 Practical Treatment Techniques for Clients, Their Parents & Their Children (IPBA Benjamin Franklin Silver Award Winner):: https://goo.gl/sZYhym
Dr. Fox has given numerous workshops and seminars on ethics and personality disorders, personality disorders and crime, treatment solutions for treating clients along the antisocial, borderline, narcissistic, and histrionic personality spectrum, emotional intelligence, managing mental health within the prison system, and others. Dr. Fox maintains a website of various treatment interventions focused on working with and attenuating the symptomatology related to individuals along the antisocial, borderline, narcissistic, and histrionic personality spectrum (www.drdfox.com).
YouTube: https://youtube.com/@DrDanielFox
Dr. Fox’s website: http://www.drdfox.com/
Dr. Fox’s Blog: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-complex-diagnosis
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/appliedpsychservices/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/DrDanielJFox1
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drdfox/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drdfox
Amazon Author’s Page: amazon.com/author/drfox
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00:00 Introduction
01:40 How Externalization Strategy Becomes Maladaptive Adaptation
04:30 Problems with Having/Being a Favorite Person
04:55 “Family In The Head” Explanation
06:30 “BPD Lens” Explanation
09:16 Notice the Patterns
09:32 Pay Attention to When You’re Depending on Someone A Lot
11:18 Build Other Connections
12:19 Learn How To Calm Yourself Down
12:56 Find Ways To Manage Emotions
14:40 Set Healthy Boundaries
15:49 Remember Who You Are